In assembly today, the headmaster, aka the Invisible man, told us that he had decided to appoint the Head Girl and Head Boy by competition. He said that there would be three judges; him, Miss Swinson (aka The Volcano and deputy head) and one luckymabob pupil rep.
The contestants would have to show academic and extra-curricular skills and would also be expected to answer questions on a specialist subject of their own choosing.
Caused a few snortlaughs in the ranks I can tell you.
But it sounds totally pants to me.
I mean what is going on? All it would mean is that every idiot in the school would have a go, and everyone who could probably do the job would run a mile. The Head said he was trying to embrace ‘contemporary culture’. Yeah. He’s about as in touch with contemporary culture as a mole in a hermit’s cave.
Ellie said she’d already heard that Skinner (class donkey and total gonk) had asked if they’d accept Nandos as a specialist subject. Ruff—who you all know from previous posts—said he’d have no chance because;
a/ he hadn’t grown up sharing a bedroom with two brothers in a house with an outside toilet.
b/ His dad wasn’t in prison and his granny was already dead.
ROMBLOL (Roll off my bed and laugh out loud)!