We did a lesson in biology on the spoiling of food. Mr Skelton, our new science teacher, told us that the government wants to change the packaging on food to show a ‘use by date’ or a ‘best before’ date, not a ‘sell by‘ date. That’s because people throw lots of stuff away.
In fact Skinner said that sometimes his cousin and his mates have supermarket rubbish bin feasts, where they go out at midnight and forage for stuff in the bins at the back of the big hypermarkets. Someone said that about half of all edible food is wasted in Europe. I know that the government is trying to make it a law for supermarkets to give food away instead of throwing it in a skip. In the States, there’s a law that says that donors–like shops that give away food that’s almost past its ‘sell by’ date–can’t be sued for poisoning anyone.
Marcus Skyrme said it would be great if we could just say “Recyculate” with a swish and a flick of a wand like Hermione’s and send it all back to the house elves so that they could make something delicious with it.
He got a very funny look from Skelton.
Ruff, who has been known to almost eat a scabby donkey, says he has his own way of assessing old fridge food.
1/–smell by date.
2/–scrape the furry bit off the top and if it looks okay eat it by date.
3/–that stuff shouldn’t be moving on its own by date.
When we asked him if he ever eaten something from the number 3 category, he wouldn’t answer.
When we told Miss Arkwright, our form tutor, that Mr Skelton was always telling us to be ‘very environmentally friendly’. She smiled and said, ”Yes, I know. He’s a bit like that with me unfortunately, only with less of the environmentally.”
Tracy Roper sprang to his defence. She thinks Mr Skelton is lush.
“Oh, come on miss. Mr Skelton’s always doing experiments and stuff. We never know what he’s laid on.”
“Really,” Miss Arkwright said with one of her smiles. The ones she kept for special people like Tracy. “You never know what he’s laid on, eh?”
It was only me, Ellie and Ruff that heard her mutter under her breath as she turned to look down to check her registration book. “Judging by the stain on the back of his jacket and the whiff, I suspect it was something quite unpleasant that was once inside a dog.”
Ruff laughed so much, I though he was going to have a fit.